“Let me help you.”
“You won’t understand.”
You’ll turn everything around on me. Every legitimate reason I give you for my predicament will be turned into something that’s my fault. You won’t grasp the subtlety of my point. You won’t see why (i)this is the way it has to be.
You don’t know. You can’t help me.
You won’t understand.
Of course they won’t. It’s a self-fulfilling prophecy. If you don’t want them to understand, they won’t. The burden is on you to help them see it from your perspective. Open up. Be vulnerable. Be honest. Then put your ego aside and listen to what they say, no matter how unpalatable the words sound.
For someone to help you, you have to help them understand.